FED UP

I got tired of explaining myself
I am fed up with trying to make myself compatible to the others
And I am so f***ing tired with your arrogance

Do not try to define me in the way you want
Do not try to mould me to your style

Because in case you haven't noticed it
I am not someone you can control
Nor can you manipulate

Accept the fact that you and I are not the same
And that we think too differently
I am not naive and never am innocent
I am much matured and wiser than you are
And please, I do think you don't understand homo sapiens enough.
Ponder that, if you may.

I am ,however, forgiving enough
To overlook and forget whatever anger and frusfration
I have against you
That's the courtesy I'm giving you
For being my friend for all these while

I want to tell you something bytheway:
It is because we love and care about someone entirely too much
That we always fail to see the other person clearly
That we always want to believe that he or she is perfect
No defection, an absolute angel,an exquisite work of God

So when I can't list out your weakness and flaw
Then you can be sure of my affection towards you
But when I can analyse your personality thoroughly
I can assure you that my adoration of you has diminished drastically

I never asked anything of you
Nor demanded anything out of you
What I wished for
Was merely for you to look at me as a friend
And to be considerate in the sense
That you will not condemn me in your dignified and seif-justified anger
That you care of my feelings,always.

I can only say that I am very disappointed in you.

Readers, please do not question the person this blog is directed to.
He or she might be someone from my school,tuition,family or even just mere acquaitance.
Thank you.

今天毕业典礼后，我家老妈和老爸对我的评价是：
“你走路真不够自信，扭扭捏捏的，不够大方.”

呃...老妈啊，你当我是您么?我才17啊~
唉，看来我要达到老妈子那等程度...还有好一段距离啊。

The solitude and peace

I always find in the safety of my bedroom

Reading my favourite book

Hugging my pillow in my arms

The pacifying feel of secureness and warmth

I appreaciate the music of rain

As I watch them fall drop by drop from the sky

Savouring the feeling of rain dripping of my face and hands

The beauty of them

So real and yet so ethereal

I love to watch my friends laugh

And love it ever more to laugh along with them

It always make me feel tender in my heart

Knowing that there is somewhere I belong

Those are beautiful days

I envy the wind

And I would like to be one too

Able to do what I like,what I want

Unpredictable Ungraspable Unstopable

I would feel so free

Nomatter the sadness I walked through

Nor the bitterness I still feel

I know they always seem little

In the face of everything

However

It is something I hold almost dear

Because they are what made me who I am

I believe in angels

Because my family are one too

I believe in God

And that doesnt need reason

Nomatter how cynical I am

I still love homo sapiens

Because I've seen kind people

And because I am one too

I'm growing up
And reality kicks in as hard as ever.

很多时候,只有自己救得了自己
只有自己,懂得疼爱自己

因为,他人,总是有比自己还更重要的人与事物
所以,若顾及不了你,那就放手让你自生自灭

人不为己,天诛地灭

近年的我,变聪明了.
怎么说呢....是觉醒吧?
那种一惊而起,瞬间万事了然的感觉

许多往往不曾想过的道理歪理
都拿来细心酝酿,然后忠心奉行着

学会把自己藏在走不出的迷宫中
让人摸不透
练习着如何以出乎意料与无法预料的思绪反应
来迷惑众人
戴上面具,千变万化的个性
奉陪着各位

若是认为我这么干,我不会快乐
只因我的心藏得太深
那请放心

我是愉悦的

当别人看不清我,我很开心

虽然做法有些使人难解
不过,这是我长期考虑之后
认为最能保护我
也最能令我快活的方法了

不管如何,我都要笑着走下去

往事是我的珍宝,未来是我的挑战

我要以一颗不止潇洒,更是无情淡漠的心面对一切

我是沈静怡的同时,还是柳千夜


可也决不忘了

多情最是无情,那无情,也何非是多情呢....?

I was informed by her close friend
that she actually misses me

How did I feel?
Happy? No,I don't think I felt that
Surprised? Nah,I suppose I expected that
Angry? Why should I?

It might be kinda cold of me
But I really,in fact, felt nothing
Like how a stranger supposed to feel
It did surprised me
The fact that I set her down
Far easier and quicker than I thought

The big mendacious part
about my friendship and her
Is in reality not her
But me.
I finally realised
How little I care about her
Well at least, far little than what I expected.

I pondered, why is that?
I clearly remember
How I used to cry for and because of her,get hurt by her
And so I gather, the hurt she gave me
Her arogance,her pride,her I-know-it-all oracle atittude
Finally kills off all feelings I had for her

Am I to blame?
Now there's the one billion dollar question.

Her friend told me she changed somehow
after we went our separate ways
My friend told me she speaks bad about me to her
when they're having tuition together

Who is speaking the truth and who's not
I already know
So the side who is lying
Careful...don't play me the fool

Her friend told me how she's hated
By some of her classmates
And that she feels lonely
Yeah I know all about that
Should I say it's karma?

However, it made me realise
How lucky I've been
That I've never once
Felt neglected and lonely in class
How happy I am with my friends
How they never put me aside.

Go with the wind.Live for your own sake.